HOPE DRIVES ME INSANE!

Hey everyone,

I just wanted to say that I haven't taking my Olanzapine (antipsychotic) last night, and I couldn't sleep the whole night. Although I couldn't sleep, I'd have to say, that I feel weird, but in a good way. I feel more mentally awake, and more energized. It's all kind of new to me. I haven't felt this way in a long time. I'm probably not going to sleep until the next night, but nevertheless, no pain no gain.

I also learned not to cling on to anything too tightly, because when I do, the OCD tends to turn the solution into an obsession. Ah, this OCD is going to drive me into a mental hospital, again. Life is just full of pain, and full of sadness to me. Every day, every waking moment is another challenge. Yet, I carry on, holding on to hope, the one thing that kind of drives me insane.

Today is going to be a long day. Lots of university work to do. I'm pretty much on the brink of failing yet another semester, thanks to my mental illness. Who knows, maybe when I leave the antipsychotics, I'll be able to do better academically.

With love,
Tareq